To be well positioned in a Republican primary, a candidate needs to want children brought to this country by their undocumented parents to remain both ignorant and sick. In this country’s long history, has there ever before been a major party so flat-out morally depraved?

Mitt Romney is appalled that Rick Perry provided education for “illegals.” But Rick Perry has a good riposte to that: Romneycare in Massachusetts provided them with medical care.

So: to be well positioned in a Republican primary, a candidate needs to want children brought to this country by their undocumented parents to remain both ignorant and sick.

And none of the rest of the Nine Dwarves has the decency to challenge this disgusting nonsense. Has there ever been a major party in this country’s history so flat-out morally depraved?

The big winner in the Republican debates …

… is Caligula’s horse Incitatus, no longer the gold standard for distinction beyond merit.

… has clearly been Caligula’s horse Incitatus.

For close on two millennia the poor beast, the victim of his master’s insane (or perhaps jocular) intention to make him Consul, has been a proverb for those offered for posts beyond their capacities. Here, for example, is John Randolph of Roanoke on John Quincy Adams’s choice of Richard Rush as Secretary of the Treasury:

Never were abilities so much below mediocrity so well rewarded; no, not when Caligula’s horse was made Consul.

As a result of the Republican debates, we can now give the innocent Incitatus – who never, after all, ran for Consul, or even galloped for it – a rest. Perry, Bachmann, Cain, Gingrich, and Santorum are all clearly less qualified for the office they seek than a horse would have been to serve as Consul. The Presidency, unlike the Consulate under the Emperors, still has real functions.

And at least Caligula proposed the entire horse.

More ugly thuggery from Rick Perry

He thinks that loose monetary policy is “almost treasonous.”

Rick Perry thinks another round of monetary expansion would be “almost treasonous,” says of Fed Chair Ben Bernanke “I don’t know what you all would do to him in Iowa, but we would treat him pretty ugly down in Texas,” says that Bernanke (a Republican appointed by a Republican) may be manipulating monetary policy to re-elect Barack Obama.

Now, as it happens, “treason” is defined in the Constitution. Monetary policy isn’t mentioned.

I don’t know what you all would do to Rick Perry, but here in California we’d call him a fool and a scoundrel. Of course his threat to “treat” Bernanke “pretty ugly” has no actual meaning, but its sheer … well, ugliness … is a reminder that this man can’t be trusted with any power at all, let alone letting him within handling distance of the Football.

As President, George W. Bush made us nostalgic for the good old days of Ronald Reagan. Perry could easily do that for George W. Bush.

Perry, Bachmann, and Christian Dominionists

There’s a difference between political fundamentalist Islam and political fundamentalist Christianity. The difference is that there’s no actual plot to subject the country to Islamic law.

If you think that Perry’s views on the Constitution are crazy, his politico-religious beliefs (and Bachmann’s), centered around Christian Dominionism, are scary-crazy.

There isn’t actually a movement to subject non-Muslim Americans to Sharia. But there is actually a movement to subject the whole country to what the most whacked-out fundamentalists think of as Biblical law.

Be afraid. Be very afraid.