Having flown 30,000 miles in the past 3 weeks, I am convinced of three things:
(1) Flying 30,000 miles in 3 weeks is a profoundly stupid thing to do.
(2) If you are that stupid and you suffer from chronic acid reflux, there is no better investment of your miles than an upgrade to the “sleeping on a mountainside” seats available in international business class. They are ostensibly less luxurious than the truly (i.e., parallel to the floor) lie flat seats of first class, but from a stomach acid viewpoint they are infinitely superior. Because many people do not want to sleep on a jacked-up bed next to their reflux-afflicted spouse, the individualized sleeping solution these seats provide could save a few marriages if they could be purchased for the home. I can see the ad campaign: “Had a spicy dinner? Ate too quickly? Why make your spouse suffer when you can fly business class? In your own bedroom.”
(3) The inflight magazine occupies an unique place in the world of publishing. Because it’s not available to the general public, reading it should feel like a privilege. After all, you have to buy an airplane ticket just to look at it. But because passengers frequently read the inflight magazine when they are bored stiff and there is no other choice available, it often doesn’t feel like a privilege or even a choice at the time. Inflight magazines thus combine the thrilling exclusiveness of a high-priced private sector product with the subjective resentment and poor quality reputation of a low cost public sector product. No mean feat.