Dust in the wind

PCP–it’s not just for breakfast anymore.

It seems that PCP is back, or never went away.

13 gang members indicted in sale of PCP

Federal prosecutors Wednesday announced two grand jury indictments against 13 members of the Grape Street Crips, a street gang suspected of manufacturing and distributing large quantities of the drug PCP throughout Southern California.

When they were arrested, the operators were in the middle of a “PCP cook” that could have produced 54 kilos of PCP, with a street value of more than $1 million, according to the indictment. The drug, which is available relatively cheaply and provides a quick high, remains hugely popular on the street, authorities said.

This is baffling. Off the top of my head, I can think of several stupid undertakings that nevertheless are more rewarding than taking PCP.

Getting “Git R Dun” tattooed on my forehead, for instance:

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Or watching “Apologize” on infinite loop:

Or working as Brian Grazer’s “cultural attaché”:

This person would be responsible for keeping Brian abreast of everything that’s going on in the world; politically, culturally, musically… . They’re also responsible for finding an interesting person for Brian to meet with every week… . an astronaut, a journalist, a philosopher, a buddhist monk… . You will be to Grazer what Karl Rove was to Bush.

Anyone who was conscious in DC or Baltimore in the late 70s to early 80s won’t need any convincing. As for the rest of you—and I feel a special sense of responsibility, as the RBC has many young readers looking for guidance in this crazy mixed-up world—just say “no” to boat. Yes, we all want to experience violent, psychotic outbursts, but there’s a downside, too.

Don’t take it from me. Listen to the OGs, like Rudy Ray Moore:

The next day, Tucker goes to visit Bucky at the local PCP rehab center where he finds a room full of kids driven hopelessly insane by the drugs. One guy thinks he’s an unborn caterpillar because he claims its safer than being a human. Another lady cooked her four month old baby in the oven because she thought it was a screaming ham. None of the doctors know how do deal with this new drug, although they are toying with the idea of ECT. All these screwed up kids gets Tucker real riled up, and he vows to get PCP off the streets.

Or the White Shadow:

Reeves and a female undercover police officer team up to try and stop a drug dealer from selling PCP to the students.

Coolidge: Hey, wait a second. Do you think Cletis could’ve slipped Phil that stuff at the party?

Thorpe: Hey, you know what? Could be.

Jackson I know how we could find out.

Hayward: How?

Jackson: Pound his head until he tells the truth.

Thorpe: Yeah, but what if it wasn’t him?

Jackson: Then we pound his head until he tells us who did!

Hayward: Hey, I’m with C.J., man. He’s right.

Thorpe: Hey, wait a minute, man. We can’t go around beatin’ on that cat like that.

Jackson: Well, anybody got a better idea? And don’t say go tell Reeves, ’cause he’ll probably do something stupid like go tell the cops or somethin’. And, we don’t even know if Cletis did it or not.

Coolidge: Then why do you wanna go pound on his head?

Jackson: Because the man is dealin’ death!

Or Steve-O:

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Or James Brown:

In September 1988, Brown, high on PCP and carrying a shotgun, entered an insurance seminar next to his Augusta, Ga., office and asked seminar participants if they were using his private restroom, according to authorities.

Police chased Brown for a half-hour from Augusta into South Carolina and back to Georgia. The chase ended when police shot out the tires of his truck.

Brown received a six-year prison sentence after he was convicted on charges of assault, failure to stop for a law enforcement officer, resisting arrest, carrying a pistol, and drug possession.

Or Brown liberal-arts grads:

Or Helen Hunt:

Still not convinced? How about Hunter S. Thompson?

Innes, son of a prominent Massachusetts Republican, was found in a jail cell Thursday by a turnkey who said Innes had pulled out his eyeballs.

Innes was arrested Wednesday night while walking nude through a neighborhood near where he lived. He was examined at Mercy Hospital and then placed in a jail cell. Police and one of Innes’ friends said he had taken an overdose of animal tranquilizer.

Police reported the drug was PCP, a Parke-Davis product not sold for human medical purposes since 1963. However, a spokesman for Parke-Davis said he thought the drug might be available on the black market.

That’s right, Hunter S. Thompson:

Question: Thompson, is there a drug now, or has there ever been, to which you would just say no?

HunterST97: Let’s see. . . .I don’t think I’ve ever seen a drug I wouldn’t try or want anyway. Yeah. PCP, I would tend to avoid that in the future. I’ve always thought it’s better to try things. Jimson weed: that’s a bitch. Everybody should do jimson weed—once. I only did it twice.

QED